You stir the waters that make my storm. Blow the winds that break the bow of my serenity. And then ask me why I am afraid?! What is this charade?
Or is the charade my own? Billowing waves pressed beneath the thin exterior of my face. You make them churn until even the casual passerby cannot deny this storm. For you desire truth “in the inward parts”.
I’d be a fool not to fear when my life, all I hold dear is seemingly threatened by these waves. Drowning my plans and fragile hopes parading as control.
That is, if this is all there is. If the creator of the storm were not with me. Beside me (albeit asleep). In the boat on my sea of divinely directed circumstances.
Maybe I won’t give him cause to question and choose faith instead of fear. A nap might be a good idea. There’s just enough room in the bottom of the boat for one more to close her eyes.
And open them to the reality of the unseen.
I get this, Kim. Yesterday so much was weighing on me that I didn't want to get out of bed. Face down on the pillow, my prayers felt like complaints. Then I felt guilt. But then I felt like He was listening anyway. Circumstances haven't changed, but I was comforted.
"There's just enough room in the bottom of the boat for one more to close her eyes."
You paint lovely pictures with your words…
kim, dear kim, i've missed you. i love this post and the faith you paint, here. i'm there on the bottom of that boat… wanting to step out… love to you. xo
That's awesome: a totally new understanding of the concept of naptime. I will try to remember this when I really need it.
i need to learn this exchange of fear for faith. fear comes too easily, faith slips just out of reach. but to learn to nap and awake with faith…this i would like to do!