Uncategorized / 09.05.2015

Me, Mom, & Missy I always worried about what to give her. So I usually sent her a book. She said I was really great at picking out cards, the Hallmark kind. I guess I had a knack for finding sentiments expressed by other people to match my own. But over the years, it got harder. Life has a way of taking the stuff we feel like is solid and orderly and making a big, fat confusing mess of it all. Relationships that you thought were just fine, even really good, have a way of morphing a bit as the seasons change. That’s...

Uncategorized / 24.03.2015

Sam's half-numb smile. "Can you please come back?"Hurriedly, I grab my bag and walk back to where I just left Sam minutes earlier after reassuring him I'd be in the waiting room. "If you want me just point, and someone will come get me.""He wants you here," the dentist says, as I sit in the chair they've set just outside the room."I'm here, Buddy." I reassure him from behind in the hopes that my voice will be enough to set him at ease.My presence. That's all I can give him.The dentist continues her procedure. I watch. His foot wiggles and shakes....

Uncategorized / 20.03.2015

I've been watching a fat robin outside my window. She caught my eye as she sat defiantly in a snow covered tree. As if to say, "It's the first day of spring, and I will have my day!" Ironic. We sat sunning, boys shirtless, soaking up pre-spring warmth in the 70's just a few days ago. Then last night winter heaved a final (we hope) breath and dumped two inches of pure white snow on our mountain side. That's the unpredictability of the season. The robin isn't the only rebel out today. I woke to someone chirping loudly outside my window. The...

Uncategorized / 13.03.2015

Dreams are birthed from desire. They're sustained by desire too. But desire can be so elusive. One day I wake up with so much excitement about my dream I can't hold it in. And another morning I can barely remember what my dream was.  Desire is suspicious, especially when we haven't claimed our dream yet. Is it really a "God-sized" dream? Is it selfish? Is it unattainable? Am I up for it? Sometimes the more we desire thing, the more suspect that thing seems. But desire is the sprout that grows from the seed God plants in our heart. You can read the rest of this post...

Uncategorized / 12.02.2015

I pet the dog this morning and let him lick my chin. I did this as I sat on the deck, drinking coffee, listening to quiet strains of music, and contemplating the glory of God revealed in a cardinal. It is Monday. My facade is falling. The masks are fading. I am learning to live from the core of who I am and have longed to be since I was a little girl.I remember when Joe and Sam were born. Four-and-a-half years apart. Both preemies. The weeks and months surrounding their births were full of crises on a level I'd never...

Uncategorized / 11.02.2015

He tells me in a text that the day's scripture is from his favorite chapter, Isaiah 58. I gave the yellow devotional, the same one that has sat on our dining table for twenty-four years this March according to the dedication in the front, to the three married couples for Christmas. Mom and Dad gave us ours when Josh was barely one year old. The daily dose of scripture, a poem, and a short paragraph or two has fed our family's souls for many meals. I usually read it at breakfast and, like that first simple meal, it supplies just enough inspiration to fuel my...